Being Gay

Over the last couple of days I have been in training for my new role within my employer. As part of a group of 25, we are becoming part of a new section within the company, focusing on a more indepth support for our large customer base. Having been in the communications industry - and the same employer - for over six years, I found the training session a tad boring.

What I found interesting was the group's composition. Out of the entire group, half were female, and most were under 35. In the entire group, four [including myself] were gay.

The part that I found sad was that I was the oldest gay person present. The other three guys were in their early to mid 20s, two of which I would describe as goodlooking musculine guys. The sad thing though was that out of the four of us, I was probably the most "butchest" one out of the lot. That's pretty sad as I consider myself to be somewhere in the middle of camp and straight acting.

During the presentations we each had to undertake, I sat back and watched with interest. I nearly choked when one of the gay guys got up, and begun their presentation - arms flying all over, wrists flapping, and the girlie infliction in the voice made even the real girls look ... well ... butch! Now this guy, who could be taken for a younger version of Kevin Spacey, would normally have me thinking of how to win him over. But, seeing him standing in front of 24 coworkers and being so feminine, put me off totally. The other two were no different. One could be easily picked out as a "sister" from a kilometre away, mainly from his walk, hand movement and voice mannerisms.

What I found sad, and in some ways disappointing, was the fact that they re-inforced the straight community's perception of what being gay is all about. Don't get me wrong. I am not saying I act like John Wayne, but by god, I don't run around at work flapping my wrists screaming "Darrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrling" and "oh! that's so gorgeous". To me, my homosexuality is the sex orientation I have.

Sure, I camp it up when I am around my gay friends or at a gay venue. But when at work or straight venues, its pretty hard to pick that I am gay. For the record, I am not a closet homosexual. Most people who have been around for a while at work know I am gay, and those that don't know, find out soon enough. I don't hide my sexual orientation in any manner, as I believe that if someone asks me, I am honest with them.

Which raises an interesting question. Why is it that most of the younger gay generation are so feminine in their mannerisms? Is it because they equate "being gay" as "having to advertise I am gay"? Is it in the water? Is it their sign of rebellion against the rest of the community? Further, by them acting the way they do, are they encouraging the stereotypical perception of what gay is, and thus, putting the rest of us on an ever increasing upwards battle for equality?

I honestly don't know. What I do know is that although one of them did interest me sexually, their mannerisms have put me off them totally. All three are nice guys, but my interest in them is non existant. If I wanted to sleep with someone with feminine characteristics, I would sleep with a woman.

James